Posts
"Focus on the Deposits, not the withdrawls." Darnyelle A. Jervey
Today is the last day of the 1st quarter of the new decade. How was it for you? Before you answer me, know that I don't want to hear all of the problems or setbacks you suffered. Why is it that when others ask us to "weigh in" on our progress, we immediately go to a place of deficit? YOUR PROMISE IS BIGGER THAN YOUR PROBLEMS. Now that you've shifted, what Incredible things happened for you this quarter?
When I am coaching a client, I always start each session by asking, what one exciting/good/Incredible thing happened and what are they most grateful for since our last session. Why? Because I don't want them to focus on the withdrawls of life.
Unfortunately, until you make a Non-negotiable decision that you are looking at life through incredible eyes, you will experience the fact that what you think about expands. I stopped watching TV because everywhere you turn the media is so focused on painting a picture that will depress you. Those debilitating thoughts of the economy, etc will keep you in a state of paranoia, wondering if your job will be the next to go. If you think like that, the thought will expand and you may find yourself counted in the unemployment statistic....Everyone seems to be focused on what we don't have...a strong economy, a booming real estate market, but WHAT ABOUT WHAT WE DO have - the deposits - HEALTH, STRENGTH, A HOME, A CAR, LOVED ONES, NEEDS MET. Sure, I could fix my mind around each of those things, which do not impact me and become discouraged, BUT I have chosen instead to focus on what I do have and can continue to enjoy in my life. Everything that you need you have it...it was deposited in you before you were formed in your mother's womb.
Don't you get bad news everyday? People are always trying to tell you what you cannot do, who you cannot be, what you cannot have. ENOUGH.
I have one simple question for you: What do YOU want?
Do you want the deposit or the withdrawl?
If you're thinking like I want you to think, you want the deposit, so I have a few quick painless tips that will help you to focus on the deposit so that you can invite more deposits into your life.
1. Minimize the amount of input you allow others to put into your experience. For example, If all you do is sit in front of CNN (or other news channel) all day, you are probably a pretty dismal individual. What value is CNN adding to your life? Life is not to be lived constantly looking over your shoulder or afraid to take the next step in your life or career/business.
2. Get clear on what you want and what it will take to get there.
3. Spend a minimum of 15 minutes each day doing positive life affirming activities: affirmations, reading something motivational, meditating, setting goals, developing a plan, writing in a gratitude journal, etc.
4. Hire a coach to help you to size it up and help to hold you accountable to the plan to begin focusing on the deposits.
5. Take a deep breath and as you exhale, picture your life as if you only experience deposits.
How does that feel?
I bet it feels Incredible!
Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey All Rights Reserved
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach, speaker and author committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in the lives and businesses of women. Her company, Incredible One Enterprises, LLC is a full service empowerment firm in Newark, DE. For more information, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
It's On the Other Side - Darnyelle A. Jervey, Speaker, Coach, Author
"Everything you want is on the otherside of what you REFUSE to do to bring it into your life."
I'm serious, think about that. No matter what it is that you keep hoping,wishing and praying you had in your life, there's is something stopping you from having it...YOU. Don't get offended by what I'm saying, if you are honest with yourself, you know I'm telling the truth!
We are the impetus that prevents us from having the life we want. Yes. Don't believe me, here's an example...I'm telling on myself.
I wanted my business to be a success, to get booked to travel around the country speaking into the lives and hearts of women since my company started in late 2007 BUT I thought that I could make it happen all by myself. Like I'm this grand and wonderful thing and I had all the answers....sound familiar? Well, let me burst your bubble like I had mine burst. EVERYTHING I WANTED WAS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF WHAT I REFUSED TO DO TO GET IT - I REFUSED TO INVEST IN MYSELF.
Are you refusing to do the same?
No (wo)man is an island. We can't do it ourselves. You may be great. I'm not taking that from you. But we can always learn from someone who is actively doing what we desire to do. Don't be asking for hand outs either, Invest in them. Fill their cup as they pour into you. I had to be willing to invest in a coach to help me to refine my strategies, solidify my brand and market to my 1 ideal customer. I was naive and dare I say ignorant enough to believe that I had the golden nugget, that I could make it happen for me all by myself. My mindset was jacked up, my heart wasn't in the right place and my approach - not Incredible! I thought, "why should I spend my hard earned money on someone else. I'm good, they can't teach me anything."
Quickly put back in my place by God in prayer AND no bookings, sales, etc....after trying to understand why it wasn't working and why the phone wasn't ringing...I got out of my own way. As a result of getting out of my own way, I made a NON-NEGOTIABLE decision and hired a business coach and joined a mastermind group and started realizing it's not about me. It is in fact about the lives that will be changed because I am operating in purpose with an attitude of abundance, not control....you see, trying to control the outcome on my own without the tools and skills to make it happen wasn't helping anyone - didn't you hear me say the phone wasn't ringing?
Being in the presence of a coach, working with a mastermind, gives you what you need to get to the other side. Trust me, I know first hand. Getting and keeping a coach is one of the BEST decisions I have ever made in my business.
As I say in my book, Maximizing the Incredible You, "If you are the bomb but nobody knows it, you blow up by yourself." I think others ought to feel the impact of your explosion. Don't you? So....
What's stopping you from getting what you want?
Are you naive enough to believe that simply because you've got it, they will come for it?
What messages are playing in your head, telling you that you can make it happen for yourself? All by yourself?
Turn off the background music, get out of your way and get the help you deserve to take your vision to the next level, get a coach.
Trust me when I tell you, everything you want is on the other side. Do it and come full circle, looking at, reaching out and touching everything you want because you DEICDED to go get it!
Be Incredible,
Darnyelle
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach and professional speaker committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in women. Her coaching program, Burn the Box is for women who are ready to stop playing small, after BIG results in life and business. To request a free consultation, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com/coaching_consult_form.
Copyright (c) 2010 by Darnyelle A. Jervey. All Rights Reserved.
I'm serious, think about that. No matter what it is that you keep hoping,wishing and praying you had in your life, there's is something stopping you from having it...YOU. Don't get offended by what I'm saying, if you are honest with yourself, you know I'm telling the truth!
We are the impetus that prevents us from having the life we want. Yes. Don't believe me, here's an example...I'm telling on myself.
I wanted my business to be a success, to get booked to travel around the country speaking into the lives and hearts of women since my company started in late 2007 BUT I thought that I could make it happen all by myself. Like I'm this grand and wonderful thing and I had all the answers....sound familiar? Well, let me burst your bubble like I had mine burst. EVERYTHING I WANTED WAS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF WHAT I REFUSED TO DO TO GET IT - I REFUSED TO INVEST IN MYSELF.
Are you refusing to do the same?
No (wo)man is an island. We can't do it ourselves. You may be great. I'm not taking that from you. But we can always learn from someone who is actively doing what we desire to do. Don't be asking for hand outs either, Invest in them. Fill their cup as they pour into you. I had to be willing to invest in a coach to help me to refine my strategies, solidify my brand and market to my 1 ideal customer. I was naive and dare I say ignorant enough to believe that I had the golden nugget, that I could make it happen for me all by myself. My mindset was jacked up, my heart wasn't in the right place and my approach - not Incredible! I thought, "why should I spend my hard earned money on someone else. I'm good, they can't teach me anything."
Quickly put back in my place by God in prayer AND no bookings, sales, etc....after trying to understand why it wasn't working and why the phone wasn't ringing...I got out of my own way. As a result of getting out of my own way, I made a NON-NEGOTIABLE decision and hired a business coach and joined a mastermind group and started realizing it's not about me. It is in fact about the lives that will be changed because I am operating in purpose with an attitude of abundance, not control....you see, trying to control the outcome on my own without the tools and skills to make it happen wasn't helping anyone - didn't you hear me say the phone wasn't ringing?
Being in the presence of a coach, working with a mastermind, gives you what you need to get to the other side. Trust me, I know first hand. Getting and keeping a coach is one of the BEST decisions I have ever made in my business.
As I say in my book, Maximizing the Incredible You, "If you are the bomb but nobody knows it, you blow up by yourself." I think others ought to feel the impact of your explosion. Don't you? So....
What's stopping you from getting what you want?
Are you naive enough to believe that simply because you've got it, they will come for it?
What messages are playing in your head, telling you that you can make it happen for yourself? All by yourself?
Turn off the background music, get out of your way and get the help you deserve to take your vision to the next level, get a coach.
Trust me when I tell you, everything you want is on the other side. Do it and come full circle, looking at, reaching out and touching everything you want because you DEICDED to go get it!
Be Incredible,
Darnyelle
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach and professional speaker committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in women. Her coaching program, Burn the Box is for women who are ready to stop playing small, after BIG results in life and business. To request a free consultation, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com/coaching_consult_form.
Copyright (c) 2010 by Darnyelle A. Jervey. All Rights Reserved.
Thursday, March 18, 2010
It Aint Easy Being Green - Darnyelle A. Jervey Speaker, Coach, Author
I know, I know you see the title and you think, "Come on, Darnyelle, Kermit the Frog, really?"
Well, not exactly. Although today is the day after St. Patrick's Day and I was extremely busy yesterday, I wanted to write my blog based on what hit my heart this week. As a coach, I am blessed to work with a lot of amazing women. I also meet new women every week by completing coaching consultations with them. An overwhelming theme this week was feeling different, alone, like no body cares. If you feel this way, let me give you hope: I understand how you feel. There was a significant amount of time in my teens and 20's that I felt the same exact way but what I found is that when I sought mentors and embraced my differences and realized that I was born Incredible, everything in my life began to change.
For me it started when I sought my purpose and decided to live with passion. That led to my attitude changing and my confidence increasing and easily, as if fitting me like a glove, I began to expect Incredible things to enter and affect my life.
And so it was. You see, by giving up the desire to be like others and embracing who Darnyelle is and was created to do for this world, I realized that my color was purple - the color of royalty, after all I'm a child of the King. I quickly left green behind and followed my heart to a place that has elevated me to a level that is indicative of Big thoughts, Big Dreams and Bigger results, which will lead to a different shage of green, the green with dead presidents embedded.
The same is available to you.
If you are feeling anything like I use to feel, you may find yourself green with envy when you see others doing what you desire to do, getting the breaks you have been praying for and as a result, you get angry and become even more introverted. It's not easy being green - whether green is envious or different; however, when you embrace who you are and what gifts, talents and abilities you were born with, it makes it easier to love the you looking back at you in the mirror.
I use to spend my time mimicking those who had it going on. It wasn't easy. I mean seriously it was hard to try to get my hair the same exact way or to find the same exact outfit that they wore so effortlessly....I got very tired, real quick. I came to this not so startling revelation with the help of some powerful mentors and coaches (before I even really knew what coaching was) You were born an orginal, but being green will make you a copy...
what would change in your life if you focused as much attention on your dreams and desires as you focus on those of others?
We often only see or think of what glitters but my grandmother use to say, "everything that glitters ain't gold."
I invite you to embrace who you are. Get to know yourself. Get to a quiet place and reflect on what you've been given that makes you an original. It may not be easy being green, but it will be a lot easier being you.
If you are ready to stop being green and ready to play Big, Bold and get what's been earmarked and reserved for you, there's some FREE goodies waiting for you at http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com.
Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey. All Rights Reserved.
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a speaker and life and business coach committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. For more information, visit her website, www.incredibleoneenterprises.com.
Well, not exactly. Although today is the day after St. Patrick's Day and I was extremely busy yesterday, I wanted to write my blog based on what hit my heart this week. As a coach, I am blessed to work with a lot of amazing women. I also meet new women every week by completing coaching consultations with them. An overwhelming theme this week was feeling different, alone, like no body cares. If you feel this way, let me give you hope: I understand how you feel. There was a significant amount of time in my teens and 20's that I felt the same exact way but what I found is that when I sought mentors and embraced my differences and realized that I was born Incredible, everything in my life began to change.
For me it started when I sought my purpose and decided to live with passion. That led to my attitude changing and my confidence increasing and easily, as if fitting me like a glove, I began to expect Incredible things to enter and affect my life.
And so it was. You see, by giving up the desire to be like others and embracing who Darnyelle is and was created to do for this world, I realized that my color was purple - the color of royalty, after all I'm a child of the King. I quickly left green behind and followed my heart to a place that has elevated me to a level that is indicative of Big thoughts, Big Dreams and Bigger results, which will lead to a different shage of green, the green with dead presidents embedded.
The same is available to you.
If you are feeling anything like I use to feel, you may find yourself green with envy when you see others doing what you desire to do, getting the breaks you have been praying for and as a result, you get angry and become even more introverted. It's not easy being green - whether green is envious or different; however, when you embrace who you are and what gifts, talents and abilities you were born with, it makes it easier to love the you looking back at you in the mirror.
I use to spend my time mimicking those who had it going on. It wasn't easy. I mean seriously it was hard to try to get my hair the same exact way or to find the same exact outfit that they wore so effortlessly....I got very tired, real quick. I came to this not so startling revelation with the help of some powerful mentors and coaches (before I even really knew what coaching was) You were born an orginal, but being green will make you a copy...
what would change in your life if you focused as much attention on your dreams and desires as you focus on those of others?
We often only see or think of what glitters but my grandmother use to say, "everything that glitters ain't gold."
I invite you to embrace who you are. Get to know yourself. Get to a quiet place and reflect on what you've been given that makes you an original. It may not be easy being green, but it will be a lot easier being you.
If you are ready to stop being green and ready to play Big, Bold and get what's been earmarked and reserved for you, there's some FREE goodies waiting for you at http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com.
Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey. All Rights Reserved.
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a speaker and life and business coach committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. For more information, visit her website, www.incredibleoneenterprises.com.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Get Your Hand Out My Pocket - Darnyelle A. Jervey Speaker, Coach, Author
Do you remember the movie Malcolm X? At the end, when they had finalized their plot to kill him, they got the ruckus started with a man standing up and saying "Get your hand out my pocket," in a loud and charasmatic voice.
When I began to think of what I wanted to blog about today, I thought of that movie and what that meant to me. Your pocket is a symbol of possession and possession is often tied to money or lack there of. If you happen to have an unhealthy relationship with money, your pockets are probably empty.
When it comes to healthy relationships, whatever we love, honor and respect creates a foundation for relationship success. i mean think about it. Think of you boo...you love him/her right? On what foundation is that relationship based? Honesty, integrity, trust, collaboration, etc I could go on and on....The same must be true of your love affair OR emotional rollercoaster with money.
Many people are caught up in a mindset that money is evil. But let me be clear, money is not evil....an obsession of money that alienates others is evil. And that obsession could be positive or negative. If you are so caught up in what you don't have that it stifles you, you are obsessed with the very thing you don't have and that can be constrewed as evil.
As the Bible says, you cannot serve two masters. I am not suggesting you serve money, quite the contrary. I am suggesting that you understand the reason why money exists and develop a healthy understanding as to why you need it in your life.
Again, let me be clear. You need money, as do I. Money gives us choices, and when you invite the shift of how to look at money and how respecting money for its purpose can allow you to live in a space that is the opposite of lack - abundance life can truly begin.
1. Complete a Self-Assessment of what you think of money. Is it healthy or unhealthy? When you were growing up, did you live with people who constantly said, "I don't want to be rich, I just want to get by?" Did you constantly tell yourself and others, "It's not about the money; I don't need to be rich?" That is not the abundance that Jesus died for and you are entitled to. How do you feel when you have money? How do you feel when you don't? Do you have healthy spending habits? Are you always saying I'm broke? Are you upset or jealous when you see others with money? These are unhealthy traits that are affecting your ability to have a great relationship with money.
2. Be honest with yourself. Own it and then prepare to change what needs to change to develop a healthy appreciation for money. What do you need money for? Why would money be a blessing to your life? Who would you be able to help if you have more than enough money?
3. Develop a relationship with a coach to help you to change your mindset and create an alignment that speaks to the abundance to which you are entitled.
4. Give. By giving, you attract money to come back to you. I give away $1 a day by hiding it in a place that someone will find it and be blessed. $1 won't break your checkbook but it will change your financial picture. Don't believe me...try it for yourself. Don't make it about you. Just arbitrarily hid $1 and know that your generosity will bless some one else. I know that the law of reciprocity is at work when you freely give of the abundance that has been given to you.
Be Incredible...it's already in you,
Darnyelle
Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey All Rights Reserved.
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach, speaker and published author committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. It is her desire to connect with women and help them to achieve a balance in life and business that allows for their Passion, Abuandance, Confidence and Expectation to create the Incredible life that they were created to live. For more information or to complete your FREE 30-minute coaching consultation request, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com
When I began to think of what I wanted to blog about today, I thought of that movie and what that meant to me. Your pocket is a symbol of possession and possession is often tied to money or lack there of. If you happen to have an unhealthy relationship with money, your pockets are probably empty.
When it comes to healthy relationships, whatever we love, honor and respect creates a foundation for relationship success. i mean think about it. Think of you boo...you love him/her right? On what foundation is that relationship based? Honesty, integrity, trust, collaboration, etc I could go on and on....The same must be true of your love affair OR emotional rollercoaster with money.
Many people are caught up in a mindset that money is evil. But let me be clear, money is not evil....an obsession of money that alienates others is evil. And that obsession could be positive or negative. If you are so caught up in what you don't have that it stifles you, you are obsessed with the very thing you don't have and that can be constrewed as evil.
As the Bible says, you cannot serve two masters. I am not suggesting you serve money, quite the contrary. I am suggesting that you understand the reason why money exists and develop a healthy understanding as to why you need it in your life.
Again, let me be clear. You need money, as do I. Money gives us choices, and when you invite the shift of how to look at money and how respecting money for its purpose can allow you to live in a space that is the opposite of lack - abundance life can truly begin.
1. Complete a Self-Assessment of what you think of money. Is it healthy or unhealthy? When you were growing up, did you live with people who constantly said, "I don't want to be rich, I just want to get by?" Did you constantly tell yourself and others, "It's not about the money; I don't need to be rich?" That is not the abundance that Jesus died for and you are entitled to. How do you feel when you have money? How do you feel when you don't? Do you have healthy spending habits? Are you always saying I'm broke? Are you upset or jealous when you see others with money? These are unhealthy traits that are affecting your ability to have a great relationship with money.
2. Be honest with yourself. Own it and then prepare to change what needs to change to develop a healthy appreciation for money. What do you need money for? Why would money be a blessing to your life? Who would you be able to help if you have more than enough money?
3. Develop a relationship with a coach to help you to change your mindset and create an alignment that speaks to the abundance to which you are entitled.
4. Give. By giving, you attract money to come back to you. I give away $1 a day by hiding it in a place that someone will find it and be blessed. $1 won't break your checkbook but it will change your financial picture. Don't believe me...try it for yourself. Don't make it about you. Just arbitrarily hid $1 and know that your generosity will bless some one else. I know that the law of reciprocity is at work when you freely give of the abundance that has been given to you.
Be Incredible...it's already in you,
Darnyelle
Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey All Rights Reserved.
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach, speaker and published author committed to imparting skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. It is her desire to connect with women and help them to achieve a balance in life and business that allows for their Passion, Abuandance, Confidence and Expectation to create the Incredible life that they were created to live. For more information or to complete your FREE 30-minute coaching consultation request, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
You're Blind Baby - Darnyelle A. Jervey - Speaker, Coach, Author
I think it was Public Enemy who rapped the song, "You Can't See"...I woke up this morning and as I reflected on how grateful I am to be here experiencing so many Incredible things, I thought about each of you. In the song, Flava Flav and Chuck D sing "You can't see what I can see, you're blind baby, blind to the facts." And before you get mad at me for calling you blind, let me explain what I mean.
It's the first Walk it Out Wednesday in the last month of the first quarter of the new decade. Many of you got excited about the new year and set Big goals yet you can't really see them manifesting in your life. Many of you do things just because it seems cute or so that you don't stand out like a sore thumb. But you do stand out because you are wandering aimlessly through your life trying to do this and that without vision and purpose.
Stop.
Today, I encourage you to begin to give yourself a check up from the heart up - what is your life description? (similar to a job description, but for your entire life) What do you want for your family? Yourself? Your Career? Your Marriage or Relationship? What is that one thing that you want to be able to go to your death bed saying, but I did it?
If you keep meandering through life without a vision and a plan, you are blind. You may see others achieving and get jealous about what they have. What it seems like they are doing somehow appears to be exactly what you want YET you refuse to create a plan for the vision so that you too can enjoy it.
We live in an abundant universe and there is a generous portion waiting for you when you begin to see. What's holding you back?
Heller Keller says, "there's nothing more pathetic than a person with sight but no vision." Einstein says "imagination is more important than fact." Proverbs says, "without vision, the people perish."
You will die if you don't begin to see.
Open your blinded eyes and for the first time this year, See. See who you are. See whose you are. See that you are bigger than your problems, See that you are a solution, see that anything is possible. See what is possible for you and then write it down. Check your vision by creating a written account of what you desire to bring into your experience.
Join us tonight at 6 pm EST for step by step coaching on your Check Up from the Heart Up. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/aimwd or 347.324.5086.
Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey. All Rights Reserved.
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach, speaker and published author committed to more than motivation, she impacts skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. For more information, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com.
It's the first Walk it Out Wednesday in the last month of the first quarter of the new decade. Many of you got excited about the new year and set Big goals yet you can't really see them manifesting in your life. Many of you do things just because it seems cute or so that you don't stand out like a sore thumb. But you do stand out because you are wandering aimlessly through your life trying to do this and that without vision and purpose.
Stop.
Today, I encourage you to begin to give yourself a check up from the heart up - what is your life description? (similar to a job description, but for your entire life) What do you want for your family? Yourself? Your Career? Your Marriage or Relationship? What is that one thing that you want to be able to go to your death bed saying, but I did it?
If you keep meandering through life without a vision and a plan, you are blind. You may see others achieving and get jealous about what they have. What it seems like they are doing somehow appears to be exactly what you want YET you refuse to create a plan for the vision so that you too can enjoy it.
We live in an abundant universe and there is a generous portion waiting for you when you begin to see. What's holding you back?
Heller Keller says, "there's nothing more pathetic than a person with sight but no vision." Einstein says "imagination is more important than fact." Proverbs says, "without vision, the people perish."
You will die if you don't begin to see.
Open your blinded eyes and for the first time this year, See. See who you are. See whose you are. See that you are bigger than your problems, See that you are a solution, see that anything is possible. See what is possible for you and then write it down. Check your vision by creating a written account of what you desire to bring into your experience.
Join us tonight at 6 pm EST for step by step coaching on your Check Up from the Heart Up. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/aimwd or 347.324.5086.
Copyright (c) 2010 Darnyelle A. Jervey. All Rights Reserved.
Darnyelle A. Jervey is a certified coach, speaker and published author committed to more than motivation, she impacts skills, strategies and solutions to define and unleash the Incredible in you. For more information, visit http://www.incredibleoneenterprises.com.
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